Sunday, July 24, 2011

Ballet Beautiful Week 2.5 and Vintage Shots

So I have been doing the ballet beautiful workout three times a week. You can check out ballet beautiful here. I will say I have noticed a big difference in my hips. I have lost about 5 pounds. This workout is that good. I should add here that I have also been walking. I'm beginning to notice the loss in my face. Here's a pic from me two nights ago.



Matt tells me I'm starting to look anorexic..and as someone who has dealt with eating issues in the past, I have to make sure I am really careful. But I also know that I need to be careful not to gain weight because I am of a short stature. (5'0. Currently at 117 pounds.) So it' s a slippery slope.

Being as self conscious as I am, it didn't make any sense when I decided to do some vintage style shots in a bathing suit for my photog friend Kory. Kory's an amazing photographer and he was game for doing something to build his portfolio. (You can check him out here if you live in the Louisville area.) I am slightly narcissistic (name somebody with a blog who isn't) and thought a vintage shoot sounded like fun.

So body issues be damned, I took a few shots. Here's one.



Kory made me feel totally at ease and even sort of pretty.

So I put it up on facebook.

It wasn't up for a few minutes, when a guy friend of mine messaged me and said. "Wow. That's an awful picture of you. No offense."

I guess he thought he knew me well enough to tell me the truth, but I am a female and, wow, did my self-confidence take a giant kick to the nads. As someone who has struggled with self-esteem issues her whole life, if you say something derogatory, I will turn back into a shy, weather-beaten teen. I am sad to say I totally did...and it ruined my night. And it sucks that I let it do that.

I think it is part of being a woman: One minute you're a lioness and the next you can feel like a weak kitten. I'm not putting the photo up to fish for complements...I am putting it up for the same reason I took it down. It makes me insecure. But, damnit, I like the photo.

So in short, ballet beautiful works quickly but is a pain in the ass (literally) and also (some) guys can be totally thoughtless.

2 comments:

  1. Awww yay, you're back!! :D I've missed you on the *~blogosphere!~*
    And I'm going to kick that fellow who sent you that comment in his groin area, because he is clearly has terrible taste /and/ terrible manners. You look GORGEOUS in that picture, like a pin-up model! <3 Don't let one rude guy make you feel bad, because I'm sure there are plenty of other people out there who think you look amazing!

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  2. I don't think guys get the vintage pin-up thing. Also, clearly this particular guy does not get the whole "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" concept. Geez, dude... work a little harder to make sure you die alone, why dontcha?

    Ten bucks says the guy in question would break the camera lens if he were in front of it AND that he weighs approximately three of you. You'll love having documented your ballerina-toned butt later in life, and he'll just be making one heck of a dent in an old couch with his. ;)

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